Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Food For Thought:

“If you have adequate self-esteem, you also have a degree of confidence in yourself. You keep yourself secure by confronting or eliminating things that frighten you. You solve problems instead of worrying about them, and you find ways to make people respond positively to you. You cope directly with interpersonal conflicts rather than wait for them to pass. Conversely, low self-esteem robs you of confidence. You don’t feel as able to cope with feelings of anxiety, interpersonal problems, or challenging risks. Life is more painful because you don’t feel as effective, and it’s hard to face the anxiety involved in making things change.

This is where the critic comes in. People with low self-esteem often rely on the critic to help them cope with feelings of anxiety, helplessness, rejection, and inadequacy. Paradoxically, while the critic is beating you up, he is also making you feel better. This is why it’s so hard to get rid of the critic. He can play a crucial role in making you more safe and comfortable in the world. Unfortunately the price you pay for the critics support is very high and further undermines your sense of worth. But you are reinforced to keep listening because every time your critic pipes up you feel a little less anxious, less incompetent, less powerless, or less vulnerable to others.”

Extract from Self-Esteem (McKay & Fanning, 2000. Pp 21.)

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Healthy self-esteem means that you have the capacity to see your dreams and visions fulfilled.

Get the help you need to be effective in your world.


To have the job and the income that you deserve.

To have and enjoy the kind of relationships that you would like.


Self-Esteem is the key to a rich, meaningful life.